Scordamaglia Oops!

Nominated for Emmeline’s Possé! You need to sit down for this. Then put a pillow in your lap to catch your jaw. Jenny Scordamaglia is a model/reporter for Miami TV (here is their Youtube channel, with 372 videos) who grew up in Colombia and apparently never developed body shame like I did.

Jenny Scordamaglia interviews two indifferent men

Jenny Scordamaglia interviews two indifferent men

Night after night, she strolls around in flimsy, showy outfits that reveal most of her tan, lovely skin. Skin which should rightfully be mine. She interviews men and women, nightclub patrons, celebrities, museum curators, you name it. She does highly public interviews on the street, chats up people at concerts—all while her clothes slide off, gape open, curtain apart, or flip up over her ass.

It’s as if a dozen horny teenage boys
with telekinetic powers are
watching from offscreen.

Most amazingly, none of her subjects seem to get distracted by her ridiculous outfits. She’s not ogled, groped, or assaulted. She’s chirpy, funny, and engaging. She’s a charmer who could captivate you in a turtleneck.

Takeaway message: Jenny demonstrates how to be ridiculously showy but not slutty. Next time you want to wear your American Apparel dress without a bra, just remember Jenny and the other members of Emmeline’s Possé, and know it can be done.

Pro life tip:
Wear one of Jenny’s blouses to the grocery store
for a  good cardio workout while you shop!
(Assuming your heart doesn’t explode from anxiety.)

Here is a a safe-for-work but not-safe-for-dropping-jaws video of one of Jenny’s interviews:

 

Follow-up from April 2013: She’s still at it!

Jenny Scordamaglia is oops-alicious. Turns out she does this a lot!

Jenny Scordamaglia is oops-alicious. Turns out she does this a lot!

Romancing the Hop! Romance + Hopping!

Someone put a plant on my dinner plate! And my heart loves it!

#SixSunday surfers: Looking for Six Sentence Sunday? It’s here.

#RomHop surfers: Welcome to my blog, where we love both Romance and Hopping!

By this point I know you’re completely romanced out. You’re probably dying for a scene where a despairing husband and wife scream at each other in the car on the way to divorce court.

I almost gave you a scene like that! My book Trapper and Emmeline is about two college kids who are inventing a new way to be in love. (Hint: It involves flirting, PDA, strangers, and a lot of sex.) There are ample chances for their budding romance to go wrong… and at one point it does.

They fight, and Trapper flees. Emmeline’s emails to him grow steadily longer and more desperate. He’s checking his computer every 30 seconds for the next one. Finally, he realizes he can’t hide forever, and meets her outside a classroom.

Read the excerpt after the jump!  Continue reading

Jenneke gives us the feels

A nominee for Emmeline’s Possé: Pre-race warm-up.

Goddamn effervescent young people.

Is Ms. Michelle Jenneke hot? Yes. Is she cute? Yes. Is she about to kick ass? Yes. Would you like to hook up with her? Mumble. Would your DH? My DH would probably pound her like a broken eject button on a crashing F-16. Are these attributes mutually exclusive? Nope! Is she a cheap sl*tty wh*re? A million times no. It hurts to even propose that question. Look how bright her soul is!

My book Trapper and Emmeline (for Kindle on Amazon) touches on the question of women and their appetites when Emmeline says: “Boys don’t really want a perverted girl. They want a nice girl who does perverted things. Tell me I’m wrong.”

I run into this outlook every now and then. If the girl is a pervert, she must be broken, with no ego, and have sexual abuse in her past. If she’s not a pervert but you can talk her into doing a perverted thing, well, that’s okay. But who decides? The difference between the two is determined by unmeasurable levels of perversity inside the woman’s head, but the difference is assigned by an outside person (like an appalled and disappointed boyfriend). Is that fair? A woman can go from being sweet-and-saucy to being a full-on worthless whore, just from a man thinking slightly differently about her. If she allows that to happen.

Continue reading

Six Sentence Sunday: Daddy Interrupt-us!

“You stand out there and ACT NATURAL. I will hide behind you and… ooh! What have we here? How delightful!”

In a passage that evokes the tapestry scene  in Hamlet (because we’re totally literary), Emmeline is having classy sex with an older family friend.

Suddenly her scary Greek construction-foreman father returns home!

She has to think fast or she and Uncle Stace (not her real uncle) will die mid-coitus in a nuclear explosion of Greek betrayal and rage not seen since [insert another classy Greek tragedy reference here].

It only took a moment for Uncle Stace to get into rhythm, but even so, my father was stomping toward us up the hall before Stace finally exploded in my pussy. The heat and wet in my belly compounded. I felt like I was a balloon filling up with cum. Stace closed the curtains between us but was still spurting into me when my father entered the room.

He looked at the expression on my face, which was probably one he’d never seen before. ….

Strangest hook-up ever! I thought.

Trapper and Emmeline, available at a fine e-proprietor near you.

* * * * *

Read more excerpts like this at Six Sentence Sunday! Six Sentence Sunday like speed-dating for one-handed readers. Here’s how it works:

  1. Pick a project – a published work or a work in progress
  2. Pick six sentences
  3. Post them on Sunday
  4. Pdon’t forget to sign up for the link list

Want to sign up? http://sixsunday.com

Hey ya’ll, I was just deflowered!

Scene from my interview with Virginia Flowers. It stopped working halfway through! Ugh, I’m so non-technical. She recommended I switch to email instead.

As if you need another reason to visit Virigina Flowers’s blog — I’m featured over there today!! Yep! I can finally delete this blog because I’ve made it to the big time. (Sample book: The Interview (Confessions of an IT Stud) by Virginia Flowers.)

In my interview, I go Full Metal Lindsey on topics that range from writing, through pee-empowerment, my memories of how awesome I was in college, metrosexual men with man-ginas, my new Trapper and Emmeline book (free today at a fine ebookstore near you), and good Romance character names (three syllables are the best). Along the way I talk about myself very frequently.

I talk about my writing process Yellow Summer, a pee story due to splatter onto the market sometime this summer:

I conducted pee research [late-breaking joke: peesearch]. I hid in the shower and then jumped out while DH was peeing and screamed at him to give me some yellow love. (Okay, martinis played a part in my planning.) Over the course of a few weeks of this, DH’s bladder turned “shy,” so I had to take my research to the Internet. There I found, as you might expect, lots of people covered in urine.

Continue reading