In which I squeeeee on Joan Defers

I will never be a cool hipster chick

Awkward hipster girl is awkward

Sure, I aspire to be an edgy and hip writer. Sure, I aspire to be cool. I aspire to have people care about my opinion. I aspire to make this blog a landing pad for smut hipsters.

But I aspire to all this while holding back tears. Because I will never ever ever match the pulsing awesomeness of blogger and erotica writer Joan Defers.

So it was a rare moment of social confirmation when I found that Joan Defers linked to one of my posts! (I didn’t even know this until recently.) Pardon me while I geek out for a second. Squeeeeee! And now, Audio-visual squeee!

Proofer's marks for erotica and erotic romance.

Proofer’s marks for erotica and erotic romance.

This is linked on the JoanDefers.tumblr. I made this illustration right at the beginning of my erotica / blogging career, and I never thought much would come of it. I love reading the comments. 🙂

And good God, have you seen her pioneering erotica blog!?

I break her online presence down like a 2-man tent after the jump.

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Pocahontas sheds a tear

Can you believe it!?

Cover of sexy 50's book "Judge Not My Sins"

Judge not my sins, because I hate it when you sit next to the bed making weird expressions as you watch me pleasure the townsfolk.

Guest author Pocahontas has but two stories on Amazon, and they both got flagged in the recent public kerfuffle about selling smutty stories. Now, Pocahontas is not the most prolific author in the world, and I wish she had kept producing at her early promising rate…but it’s still quite a blow, and quite dispiriting, to have her catalog wiped off Amazon overnight.

In case you don’t know, Pocahontas Stormer is the pen name for a writer with highly focused tastes. She couch-surfs this blog because she has no place of her own. Her two titles are Forced to Suck: Big Brother Bouncer and Fucking my Big Brother in New York.

Can you see why Amazon banned them? It’s not that they skirt a very taboo subject (though the characters aren’t really related). It’s simply that if your ebook titles, covers, and descriptions are so explicit they make Amazon’s “also-boughts” look like certain pages of xvideos.com…well, then you’re going to have a hard time.

What next?

pokie-looking-grim

Mull… mulll…

Pocahontas is mulling over new, cleaner, but equally suggestive titles for these stories. It’s sad because these stories were written to be lurid, escapist, and “easy.” They really should be titled that way, or else the readers who want lurid, escapist, and easy stories won’t be able to find them.

Say for example that you were in the mood for a campy movie. You would look for titles like “Bikini Carwash.” You wouldn’t glance twice at something called “Water Droplets Land On Beauty.”

Now, what if “Water Droplets Land On Beauty” somehow appeared in your Amazon also-boughts, and you glanced at the cover?

This cover won't make anybody happy.

This cover won’t make anybody happy.
(Beautiful CC picture by audreyjm)

Nope. Really, if you want to repel customers, why not just use pictures of maggots?

In the 50’s the books were called things like “Satan’s Rock” or “Daisy’s Decline” because otherwise they would get squashed by government censors and the other crusading concern-trolls of the day. We smut self-pubbers could probably learn a few things from the writers and book-sellers who worked in the more repressive decadesof American history. I wonder if there’s a “How I Wrote Porn in the 50’s” memoir out there…

My theory

The push-back by prudish e-book sellers against explicit titles and covers is going to fizzle… and it will fizzle without intervention or excessive complaining from the smut-writers who are currently suffering. The money is too good to ignore and the competition for dollars is too fierce. The large smutty ebook market may become less obvious, but it will still hum along out of sight, like a remote control vibrator with fresh batteries.

Maybe an Amazon.com subsidiary will create a new adult e-commerce site full of dirty products. If it’s not Amazon, maybe Draft2Digital or SmashWords will exploit the huge opening. If Amazon only wants to sell wine, then millions of entrepreneurs will pop up to sell the cheap beer.

I propose a “dirty Amazon” site, and we call it Mississippi.com.

 

Life in a flickr photo stream

blonde mom1 from flickrNew possé member! blonde mom1 is a lovely woman who has shared the spectrum of her life in 300 pictures. For what it’s worth, men respond verry well to her.

Personally, I marvel at her poise. She has that social-media skill of being able to control her message… she patiently slaps down pictures of her life like they’re Tarot Cards. Her impeccable flickr feed presents a dreamworld where people can do mundane, lifey things but their hair is never bad.

This is why the voices in my head voted her into Emmeline’s Posse: The part of her life that she shares on flickr is a work of art.

More art after the jump…

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